Silvia Hartmann's Project Sanctuary
The Soul Pilots
Well, where should I start with this?
Perhaps I can start with finding that I have way too much energy, and no matter how much I work, how hard I play, exercise, have sex, try and immerse myself in relationship dramas et al, the sense of there somehow BEING MUCH MORE THAT I SHOULD BE DOING, never really went away.
That's not a new thing, I've had that for as long as I remember.
Recently, it has been getting much, much worse however.
I've been repairing my energy system for a while and then started on the autogenic body. In the course of that, I found that I use ENERGY SUPPRESSORS constantly - coffee, cigarettes, depressing thoughts, well anything really to make all that surplus energy go away.
I began to restore some of these systems - and was left with EVEN MORE energy than before, and that's when things hit an excruciating impasse.
How many paintings can you do in a single day? How many essays can you write? How many friends can you call, songs can you sing, trips can you do, how many sex and therapy and dance sessions can you fit into one single day?
It was beginning to really drive me crazy, and I started to look around for other things to spend my overflowing bounty of energy on. Nothing really worked for me though and I ended up thinking that I might need to invent something altogether new that had never been before, some way to move your body or have sex which would alleviate this energy reservoir.
Well, at the same time I had often the sense when going to bed for a nap that I should be doing something else instead, but I couldn't quite work out what it was. This held also for other circumstances, such as talking to "clients" and certainly the general construct situations, such as dinner parties, one might find oneself in - a sense of not doing the right thing, and always being in the wrong place at the wrong time, somehow.
Until one fine evening in early February, I had an idea.
The previous afternoon I had had a Sanctuary experience whilst I slept of going somewhere very specifically and there was a man.
He floated in midair and around his head was a steel band, so tight that it had grown right into his skin and was compressing his skull. I had the notion that it had been placed there when he was about nine years old; at that time it would have fitted him perfectly of course.
Now, he was near to death and in excruciating agony which was constant from that band.
I was able to dissolve the band and restore his head to full functioning, upon which he relaxed all over, the wrinkles in his face just disappeared and he fell asleep, looking very beautiful and tranquil now.
When I do these things "in Sanctuary", they have a special quality about them. They are so very real, so very clear in every detail, but more, when I'm there it feels exactly right, I know what to do and how to do it, and I am "other" than my stumbling hard self (no disrespect intended!).
I have a real sense of "doing the right thing" but not only that, I know exactly at the time that it has to be me doing it, very specifically, and that what I did was VALUABLE.
With live clients, I never have that same sense, and I used to berate myself for that, but here I am proposing that I was right - real, valuable change happens elsewhere, namely in Sanctuary, and that this is where I can do what I came here to do.
So I propose the following theory.
It is possible that we have circuitry that is designed for non-physical things, from astral travel to meeting with non-corporeal entities and then some.
When this circuitry is alight, then it generates a very special kind of energy which needs an outlet in action - astral action, for the want of a better word, or Sanctuary action, if you will.
There are things we are actually designed to do on these other planes, interactions to partake in, parties to go to, people and entities to meet, learn from and also help if we can.
If we don't do these things, we are left with a PRESSURE of unfulfilled energy needs - both of the giving, as well as of the taking variety! - that we then try to compensate for by frantic action in the hard, or alternatively, if it all gets too bad, by stalemating and depressing ourselves into a near coma of inactivity instead.
This really tallies with my own personal experience of the matter, both when I am in those realms, and when I'm not.
I have memories of "soul pilot" endeavours which are clearer, brighter and more astonishing, deep, powerful and glowing than ANYTHING I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED IN THE HARD.
I personally have ALWAYS known that they were ABSOLUTELY REAL because of course, I also hallucinate and daydream and do make belief and I ABSOLUTELY KNOW THE DIFFERENCE between these real memories and just messing about in my head.
Now it is true that I haven't TOLD anyone about this (that's btw, the difference between sane people and lunatics - a lunatic will SAY that they are seeing snakes and a sane person will see them, but know not to mention that to those who can't!) but in my own private realms, I know what is what.
However, I have always berated myself for having both these experiences and treasuring them as much as I do, on the grounds that "only ugly, unsuccessful lonely losers make up invisible friends and experiences that a REAL person should be seeking with lovers and family in the hard".
And I have further stopped myself with a vengeance from having such experiences too often, or from dwelling on them too much - very much actually BECAUSE THEY ARE SO ATTRACTIVE, POWERFUL AND MEANINGFUL.
These experiences really show up the flaws of the hard.
They really do, because for me, the hard simply pales into insignificance in comparison.
Now for all those many years, I was trying to be a good construct - work hard, care for my children, keep the house clean, look sexy, consume as much as possible, drive a nice car, get the respect, love and envy of other constructs and all of that.
It was a difficult thing, a very HARD thing for me and I was always on the verge of giving it up for a lost cause anyway. If I had allowed myself more access to these realms of power, beauty, REALNESS I would have been physically and psychologically incapable of doing all that hard meaningless slog, day in, day out, which I then thought was the hallmark and the duty of anyone who wanted to be a "good person".
I have now come to see the error of my ways, and I have much compassion and absolute understanding for my past self and how she came to those conclusions, and why she did what she did.
Still, I am left with ancient entrainments, and lots of them.
The thing is that "soul pilot" endeavours are as yet, simply NOT given the same level of importance by the conscious mind as say, brushing your teeth, or paying your credit card bills.
Or even mopping the kitchen floor - all things HARD are being given preference, precedence and more importance then the things from the other planes.
In the construct world, this is held to be sensible and actually necessary for survival, but for anyone who sees MORE than that, it is a terrible thing, a limiting thing and a very, very self destructive thing indeed.
Hysterical middle aged women need MORE than an orgasm once a week to keep it together - they need to use their psychic circuitry, for the want of a better word!
Old people in homes need MORE than to stroke a pet once in a while to have a sense that they are still NEEDED - they need to use the same, the exact same psychic circuitry to keep them active, alive, and HEALTHY.
This is a very good explanation as to why monks, ministers and nuns live so very much longer statistically than any other part of the community. It isn't because they don't have sex, but because they USE THEIR PSYCHIC CIRCUITRY on a DAILY AND REGULAR BASIS.
Now, just prayers are one thing - Soul Pilot work is another altogether.
The Perfect Vibration
I can't go any further in the discussion of this subject without bringing in my own personal most intense Soul Pilot experience - namely, In Serein.
If you are unfamiliar with this, it is a long Project Sanctuary story I lived in real time over a period of eight months and where I gave precedence to that unfoldment over everything else in my life.
People have often suspected that it is MY story - but it isn't.
My personal life's story has some RESONANCES to what goes on in In Serein, but it isn't the same.
I think that *my personal life experiences* set me up to be able to go on a mission and be able to help someone, somewhere, to move along - in short, In Serein is a rescue mission for the entity that became the metaphorical character of Lord Lucian Tremain.
If you know the story, then you will understand what I am saying next, namely that it would have taken a very special person to help Lord Lucian.
And this has nothing to do with whether someone is a good healer, a powerful prophet or entitity, or particularly enlightened - Jesus Christ himself wouldn't have had a hope in hell to reach Lord Lucian. Mother Theresa would not have been able to reach him, and neither would Ghandi or the psychotherapist next door, or you, for that matter.
My personal set up and the experiences I have had in this lifetime CREATED THE RIGHT FREQUENCY which was a match with this entity, or at least a match enough so I could reach him and create the transformation, or should I say, get HIM to a state where HE WOULD MAKE THE TRANSFORMATION AND TRANSITION.
Lord Lucian had to unstick himself in the end, he just needed some assistance, and this assistance had to be offered in exactly the right way or else he could not have made any use of it.
And therein lies the magic.
The more enlightened beings in the Starfields cannot reach these guys who are stuck somewhere in the darkness; their resonance is no match to them, and the "darkness guys" will shrink from their touch, if you will.
But WE CAN.
We can, exactly BECAUSE WE ARE NOT PERFECT OURSELVES.
Each and every one of us is flawed by the very fact of being here, and these "flaws" make each one of us very - VERY! - unique.
Any one of US, therefore, who will go out on these other planes to offer assistance, will be ABLE TO ASSIST someone, somewhere (and most likely, more than just one!) in a way the greatest enlightened being NEVER EVER COULD.
We can reach them because the resonance of OUR OWN LIVES allows us to travel to them and they respond to us, just like someone will respond to a particularly sad record if they themselves are sad as well.
This resonance match is the rapport, the LIFELINE if you will, for these others who need our help.
I borrowed the term "soul pilots" from Robert Monroe, the "out of body" researcher. He had his people go to places and assist "lost souls", help guide them to the next step when they had gone astray or become stuck somehow.
But that's by no means all there is.
Nor is the "service to others" the end of the story, not by a long shot, but we might as well start there.
My total breakthrough understanding on the nature of "service" and what that can do for YOU in return came with my visits to the shores of the Universal Ocean.
I went to this beach hut every single night for six months during a time of great upheaval and just went to sleep there, guarded by a gentleman called James.
This was no great being of light, but instead, manifested as a white man of about fifty years of age, blond and balding, slightly overweight and short sighted, but with a real kindness about him.
I have absolutely NO such person in my hard life, nor any recollection of anyone even approaching the "resonance" of James, but there was just something about him that was JUST RIGHT and when he was there, I could just lie down and go to sleep and feel safe whilst he just sat and watched me sleep.
And that is a real point in case for that "resonance".
Do you think I would have been able to relax for a second with Jesus Christ at the bottom of my bed, Buddha or Krishna, or a saint?
But with James there, I could sleep and heal.
I asked him over and over if he didn't have anything better to do, and I thanked him over and over for being there; he always just smiled and shook his head and said, "It's alright you know, one day, you'll understand ..."
I tried to give him presents or do something for him in return but he always declined; not in a rejecting kind of manner but just steadily, and I always got the impression that there was something I had to learn about this for myself which made the giving of presents or returning of favours completely unneccessary, only I didn't really understand that yet for some reason.
Then the day came when I decided to write up my trips to the beach hut for "HypnoDreams 2".
I "go into a trance" when I write these things and so, immediately I was there, in that PLACE that really exists and is beyond my own imagination, and this time, I brought someone with me who I was taking there for healing and relaxation, and possibly for redemption.
The other person (a woman of perhaps sixty years of age, quite stern looking and quite skinny) lay down on the bed and then I realised that I WAS IN JAMES'S PLACE, THAT I WAS THE GUARDIAN.
I was totally overwhelmed by this and spiralled immediately - "Me? Me? I??? But ... I can't possibly ... such honour ... such honour ... you can't really think that I deserve such an honour ..."
James turned up immediately and he stabilised me, I was crying hard and he held my hand and said, "Yes of course, of course you can do this, you just have to be here ..."
So I did, I sat with the woman for a long time, and all the time I was there I was totally overwhelmed that I COULD POSSIBLY BE DOING SOMETHING AS SACRED AS THIS.
I understood absolutely why James needed no rewards.
The very act of DOING THIS was the reward. And such a reward!
I still to this day can't believe that I can deserve such - rewards, it doesn't cover that feeling of BEING ALLOWED TO SERVE.
It heals you somehow, it makes things alright, it means that you are good enough, that the creative order has a place for you and that you're not just some driftwood thing that no-one cares about, no-one needs and the only contribution you could ever make was to feed some worms upon your demise.
For me, it was like an acceptance ceremony into the holy order of creation.
I was good enough to help another on these planes where there ARE NO LIES POSSIBLE, where all shells have disappeared and you are your true self, nothing more, and nothing less.
And you are not just perfect, but the PERFECT MATCH to certain individuals - it had to be YOU ABSOLUTELY.
For me, it had to be James. Of all the entities, all the beings in the Universe, it had to be JAMES to make me feel comfortable and cared for.
I don't know who or where James is. He may be alive or dead, he may have lived many centuries ago but travelled in the other realms back then, and there, time is of no meaning and no essence at all.
To have tried to find him in the HARD amongst a billion people strewn out everywhere would have been madness, even if he was around at the same time I am - he may be a baby still, or an old man now with senile dementia, for all I know.
Whereever he is IN HARD TERMS, my gratitude to him is inordinate and yet needs no action or repayment - yet another thing that can't work like that in the hard.
So, service isn't HARD service (exhausting yourself, putting others before you even though you don't want to, making hats for the homeless or endlessly washing leper's feet) in these realms, but actually a holy activity with its own inherent laws and rewards.
And now, what next?
Firstly, for anyone who understands this and gets this, a declaration is necessary to restore this other planes work to its rightful place and importance in the scheme of things.
This IS PRACTICALLY IMPORTANT.
Remember, I said that without PSYCHIC ACTIVITY, middle aged women go hysterical and old folk wither away and die, so this has to do with survival and it isn't just a party game for bored folk.
So time must be found in EVERY DAY to actively go out and do something with this.
Actively, consciously, deliberately, with volition of forethought.
The act of sitting down somewhere and saying, "Ok, I'm going to Pertineri Market, let's see if there's something for me to do there ..." or whatever bridge you want to use to go enter these other realms with the view OF PROVIDING SOME SERVICE THAT ONLY YOU CAN PROVIDE, is a HUGE declaration and shift in the value of Soul Pilot endeavours.
I've recently completed the "Living Energy" manual and in it too it says that we "MUST bring the other realms and the hard together, and we must absolutely STOP relegating experiences to weekend workshops or once in a blue moon meditations that have nothing to do with our "real" lives."
If you want to help, contribute, teach, heal and really make a difference to someone who really needs YOU, then this is the way forward.
I am so convinced of that, it is difficult to describe how right and congruent this feels.
And the key is that they need YOU.
You're not some random doctor in a conveyor belt hospital on the astral planes who could be ANYONE AT ALL.
Your personal, exact and most specific resonance is of the essence.
It is the key.
It will take you to the right people, the right aliens, the right events, the right energetic occurrences in the universe which is teeming with events we know consciously nothing of as yet.
Evolution Of REsonance
Here's another thing.
When you go into some form of astral service work, IN DOING THE SPECIFIC SERVICE your own resonance begins to change - it begins to evolve.
I am absolutely NOT the same resonance anymore that I was BEFORE I completed In Serein. That changed my resonance (although it didn't change me as a person or my material circumstances!) very strongly - it moved it along on an unfoldment path.
You may remember "The Prince of Pertineri", an incident where a servant came to fetch me in Pertineri Market right out of the blue to help the prince who was going insane. That also changed me, not as much as In Serein, but you could say it added to my experience as a Soul Pilot and allowed me to encompass new and different resonances.
Now, I don't have to tell you that I am not the same person AFTER the service experience with James than before. I think anyone can feel that one, even me!
In the hard, I've ticked off most of the required life experiences. I got born, raped, raised (sort of), had relationships, fell in love, had children, raised them (sort of), buried my parents, did my work, was a teacher, an artist and a healer, made my contribution to construct society, and build a business from scratch.
That's mostly it then and the LACK OF WHAT TO DO NEXT (rather than sitting around waiting for death, or doing something like the family deal all over again with a new batch of kids or buying a bigger car this time around) was seriously driving me crazy.
I propose that the challenges and tasks available to me on the other planes ARE ACTUALLY STEP STONE CHALLENGES which are part and parcel of a normally proceding human incarnation - when you have your midlife crisis, you solve it by becoming a soul pilot!
Now I was being mirthful there, really, I would have thought that we're just actually beginning to resolve a HUGE BACKLOG OF EXPERIENCES AND RESONANCE EVOLUTION STEPS that should have been developing hand in hand with the hard life experiences, at the same time, and probably would have, if they had happened in sync with the rest of our lives, would have made the world a very different place to us in every conceivable sense of that phrase.
So here we have a set of intensely satisfying and UPWARD SPIRALLING personal development challenges that have INORDINATE levels of rewards in every way, if my Ocean Wood experiences and In Serein is anything to go by.
All we need to do now is to:
a) make a declaration of intend to start doing this, every day, as best we know how, and
b) resolve all and every possible objection to this ecologically and holistically ...
to start on a very profound trail of personal experiences, custom made to make the very most of our ongoing incarnations.
I am absolutely delighted to have found this, to have it come to my conscious awareness as it finally did, and to be honest, I can't wait to get started - in fact, I'm going to go off and start, right now!
The Soul Pilots (Acrylics On Linen) SFX 2004